Over the next few days of this Holy Week I plan to reflect on two simple questions: What might keep me from weeping on Good Friday? What might keep me from rejoicing on Resurrection Sunday? Weeping and rejoicing aren’t the only appropriate responses on these days, but the testimony of the Church has been that they are certainly primary responses as we consider the death and resurrection of Jesus in the most personal terms. So, contemplating the crucifixion this Friday without experiencing the grief of my complicity might indicate a heart that has been distracted from its own selfishness and sin. Likewise, if I don’t experience joy on Sunday – not, mind you, a manipulated happiness – then it’s likely that my heart has found its hope and meaning somewhere other than the empty tomb.
There is, thanks be to God, always time to repent. But maybe this last week of Lent, with the anticipation of tears and joy, provides a useful urgency to our prayer: Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (Psalm 139:23-24)